Things I am looking forward to in America..in no particular order.

Give or take 6 weeks until my return to North Carolina after over a year away. And although I know I will miss living in Europe tremendously (don't worry, I'll have a list of things I will miss here..) I wanted to kick off my return with my top ten list of things I'm looking forward do for this year.

1. Returning to the land of Target. Oh you know, only the best place in the world- where you go can go for make-up, shoes, clothes, the present you forgot to buy your friend who is having a baby, dog treats, home goods, stationary galore, and Targets very own flavored water for the way out the door. It is a mecca. Which I have missed beyond belief.

www.collegegrad.com

2. Of course, my family, friends and Porter. That should go without saying that I am so excited for our multiple "girls reunion". A year away is a long time in the scheme of things, and I am ready to make more memories with the people I love. Thank you for being there for me this past year, and supporting me through all of my decisions.

3. Mistletoe Half Marathon in Winston Salem December 3rd. Running with my cousin, and best friends. Can't wait to see what ridiculous outfits we will pull out for this. There has been talk about reindeer ears, Santa costumes, and dressing as elves. Regardless, the run is for an amazing cause- Childhood Obesity Awareness and it's with some of my favorite people! I'll be the drunk elf in the parking lot after the run, FYI.

www.miserableretailslave.com

4. Spending both Thanksgiving and Christmas at home this year. I love the holidays and although it was nice last year, there's nothing like spending it with the people you love the most at home. I'm already in the festive spirit and it's not even October yet. Watched Love Actually once already- check, planning out a elf running outfit- check, thinking about all of my Mom's amazing Thanksgiving day food (and the Macy's day parade)- check. My Mom has even mentioned renting a cabin for her birthday/Thanksgiving in the Mountains this year. I know one large Weimaraner that would love to run in the woods for Turkey day.

5. Football. No, I'm serious. The American kind. That involves beer. College, NFL. I just want to watch it. And happily participate in tailgating with my friends who have season tickets (cough, cough Katie Joyce.)

Two of my favorite people in the world! :)

6. Realizing that I still haven't seen a lot of my own country after living in someone elses. So many places in America that I'd like to further explore. California is on the top of the list, NYC (can't get enough), Chicago, Texas, Las Vegas, Colorado. East coast vs. West coast... looking forward to the ride.

7. Southern cooking. I mean- who doesn't crave a Bojangles chicken biscuit while hungover on a Sunday? Or if I know those Smith girls, it'll be $25 worth of Taco Bell.

8. Returning to school. New year, new direction, new game plan.

9. Horseback riding. For those of you that don't know, I used to ride and own horses in my teens. A simple fall, and a trainer who didn't make me get right back on, resulted in 10 years since I've ridden. Thankfully, I know a great place to get back my courage to ride again. Brandi is an extremely talented rider, trainer and friend and I am really looking forward to being part of Heart to Heart Stables.

10. NYE 2012 in America. Last year we celebrated in Dublin. Can we beat that Stateside? I'm always up for a challenge :)

A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in. -Robert Orben

The month of August. Four weeks of Holiday. I know people think "Wow, I'd love to have four weeks off from work.." Yes, granted it was an extended version of what Americans typically experience, but that being said- I had a lot of down time. The family was off to South Africa, and I was splitting my time between Holland and London. Rather than bore you with an overly long summary of each and everything thing I did, I figured I'd review my holiday in photographs.

Enjoy.. I know I did.

Mauritshuis in Den Haag, Holland www.curatedmag.com

Rembrandt's"Anatomy Lesson"- Mauritshuis www.psyc.queensu.ca

Veemer "Girl with a Pearl Earring"- Mauritshuis www.picasaweb.google.com

Wassenaar beach, Holland www.redbubble.net

Brouwerij't IJ Brewery- Amsterdam www.panoramio.com

London- day drinking with Cat Ninja and Lindsey

Favorite place in the World.

Lindsey and I on the way to Borough Market and Pimm's Saturday

Dinner in Camden with Lindsey&Chris

Typical. Meow.

Not Pictured: 

*Gay Pride 2011 Concert in Amsterdam

* Friday evening in London, dinner at Pacifico.. followed by dancing and drinking at Roadhouse till late.

*Outstanding dinner at Kait & Ash's flat in London.. amazing food cooked by Chef Ash, and even better company.. Kait, Ash, Kait's beautiful Mom Amy, and Ash's little brother- Aaron. Thank you again "friieeennnddsss!"

Although I had an incredible holiday, I was ready for the kids to return. Talk about a big and empty house, it definitely at times reminded me of  "The Shining.." and we all know how that turned out.. "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"

PSA: "The greatest risk in life is not taking one..."

As many of you might have read a few months ago, I was planning on extending my European holiday for another year for school. I applied, and then began an International Business and Management Studies course. I was so excited at the prospects of what this might have in a forward motion towards a career. A week after my program began, I received notification from my school in the Hague that they were not going to be able to officially accept me into the school. As an American, I was baffled. What do you mean not accept me, I have already started classes in an advanced course I had to interview for- and I was accepted into the program? To sum it up, one of my Math requirements did not translate into Dutch standards and therefore it appeared as though I didn't meet the requirements. The day I was pulled from class to hear this news was frantic- dealing with my Mom, with Jack, with the Enrollment office, and International office. I came back to the house- distraught... what would I do now? For a while I was planning on staying on the shady end of illegal- well, yes, illegally staying without a residence permit which is actually common practice. But then I realized that if I screwed over the Dutch, then would I ever be able to live in another country legally again? Ultimately one of my long term goals is to live in London- therefore, with the British being one of the most difficult countries I've heard of to gain a visa, the last thing I want to do is give them a reason not to accept me eventually. Fooling one country into staying an extra year illegally didn't seem like the smartest move. So, I began planning "Plan B". What if I couldn't get my schooling worked out, what if I had to go back to North Carolina in three months since that's when I truly became illegal? Where would I pick up after a year abroad?

The next morning the school emailed me, they had made a mistake with my transcripts and I could begin classes again the following morning. Surprisingly, I wasn't as happy as I should have been to hear the news. And that worried me. Maybe three years away (yes, I know I said it would be an extra year, but the program was for three) from my family, friends and Porter was too much. From last Monday on, I've been in perpetual doubt of my decision to stay. Am I making the right choices financially (school here is mighty expensive for three years), am I doing the right thing by staying an Au Pair (Do I really want to do this any longer- as much as I love ironing 5 days a week? Sike.) would I be able to stay the entire three years away from my family besides a visit once a year? And so this week I decided that it's in my best interest to return back to North Carolina. Yesterday, I announced to Jack and Eva who have been tremendously supportive and encouraging in my decision to stay in Holland, and then my decision to return home that I would be leaving.. I've told my good friends and family my decision to return to America, and now the eldest child Christiaan knows. The general consensus tends to be sad and disappointed on this side of the pond, and extremely excited on the other. I am somewhere in the middle still. Although I feel like a weight is lifted off of me now that I've made a decision to return, multiple times a day I remind myself just what I'm leaving behind.. amazing friends, a family that has truly made me feel welcome and valued, a beautiful country and an experience I will never, ever forget. Friendships I hope that will last the rest of my life, a relationship with the three Dutch children who have taught me a new found patience and determination I didn't even realize existed in such a short time, and new personal strengths that I never knew I possessed when I left North Carolina just over a year ago.

Between now and November 1st I will return to Winston Salem where I haven't lived since I was 18. I have no idea how I will feel when I return- but my goal is to stay busy. To move forward with the same direction, drive and purpose I felt here when I began school. To start academically again in the Spring, to be active with friends (already planning those 1/2 marathons and hopefully another marathon next year) multiple reunions, beginning horseback riding again at Heart to Heart Stables in Randleman (you should check it out, I happen to know the owner and she's amazing) and spending lots of time with my family and my favorite Weimaraner.

I will miss the ones I leave behind tremendously. My heart is full thinking of the good times we've had, and the memories I will always hold close. Thank you for being my family while I was away from my own, for being my best friends, my confidants, and majority of the time, my sanity. I have learned so much from each one of you and I am so fortunate to have you in my life. I know that no matter what path we take, we'll always be a plane ride, an email, or a phone call away- You're stuck with me Betches.